am mature enough

was chat with my cousin just now.yes...my cousin was right.
[you're mature enough to think that what you should and shouldn't do]
[you're mature enough to do and think what you should do]
yes~!CHEISEY,you're mature enough!!!!
stupid!
mature enough to do anything and think anything what you suppose to do and think.
but,buttt why??W.H.Y?
you're a twenty-year-old girl.
an age for a human to mature enough,an age for a human to think his/her future,an age for a human to think but not just rely on your parent!
anything,yes!anything you should done by yourself.
think some way to solve it whenever there's problem,but not just only knew [mom] here and [mom] there.
yes,thank to my cousin for what he talk to me!and it woke me up seriously.
everyday just knew how to eat,sleep,play.
nowadays,you can't rely on your parent anymore.
yes!just because of you are really mature enough to done all things by yourself!
think!think carefully for your future!plan carefully for your future!
earn money by yourself to pay for your parent to consume but not to think to spend your parent's money!
they already spend enough for you on this past twenty years..now your turn to let them spend yours...
now only i realize that i'm loser...i had completely lose this war....
why?why is life so inexorable?
what i can say now is i wanna bang wall to suicide...
where's my brave?is it suicide can solve any difficulty?stupid cheisey!fml
use your brawn to solve it but not choose the most stupid way to solve all the thing and difficulty that you need to face!!
i just knew what?i just knew it's hard to survive if you had nothing especially your brave and your brawn!!
lastly,CHEISEY,GO!GO TO CHASE YOUR MONEY but not just sit at home without doing anything!
again,DON'T rely on your parent anymore!!fml
i just felt so hard to survive and am grieved enough!!

有一个人

有一个人 你以为他是你的永远

但是他却告诉你 你只是他的过客

有一个人 你总说要放下他

却总是忍不住又拿回来回味

有一个人 他不会主动和你聊天 但你会忍不住想和他聊天

有一个人 你一上线就会去看他在不在.

在 又不敢打扰他.

N.E.W

A NEW DEAREST COME TO ME AND WILL ACCOMPANY ALL THE WAY FOR ME




that is.....---->>lappie!!


<3 it soooooo much....


25/10/2011

19102011

feel like wanna blogging but don't know what to blog,what to write.
recently listen at those depressed and sad song,i rewind many memories that made me unhappy.
familyyy..friendddd....what i had done went wrong....felt sad...
horoscope shown that Libra is such a friendly people,good in socialite...
but,butttt am i?truly,I'm not.
I'm afraid when I'm facing public.
I'm afraid when I'm in a strange places
I'm highly dependent person.

I'm always pessimistic whenever i encounter difficulties.
I'm always envy others daughter has a happiness family,their parent so love them.
what about me?what about mine?are they really love me?are they love me with a different way,different way with others?
i just hope that my parent can love me,treat me just like how they love,treat brother.in the same way....
i just hope that i have a bunch of friends even one beside me whenever i need them...

I'm used to cry in blanket in late night when I'm feeling so sad and wanna wreak...and will found out there's a pair of monster eyes on ma face.
I'm used to be trance when there's something afflicted and grieved me.
my life had just so many WHY? WHY? and why?
i hope i can being contentment...I'm happiness actually compare with others,those who don't have rice to fill in their tummy when hungry.those who don't have drinks when they're thirsty.
cheisie,u're now can fill up your tummy with lotsa yummy food when u're hungry,u can drink tasty beverage when u're feeling thirsty.
what you want some more?what u still grumbling for?
Lollll.am scolding myself....=.=!!


i hope,
i hope,
i hope i can do so...
please...
THANK GOD!! :D

15102011

什么?
连上帝先生都不帮我吗?
一时崩溃到不知如何是好
本小姐
真的 真的很喜欢音乐啦
娘子 我真的 真的不是纯粹喜欢
我想要 很多 很多
我想要学唱歌 学跳舞 学钢琴
我告知你
娘子，要学跳舞
你回话:学什么学?有用吗?
哇塞...崩溃惨了 想撞墙..
那我梦想耶 梦想
不是随口说说的
本人想了很久很久

甚至每有学校介绍
眼睛就只有 【音乐】两个字
其他，其他的 都看不见啦
娘子 你怎么可以这么扫兴
竟然泼我冷水
把我丢在冷冻现场就这样不了了之

音乐!!音乐!!!就你啦
你是我的梦想
可偏偏连上帝都不帮我啦
全部要我自己一手创
什么 什么 都要【基础】
对!!就是【基础】!!!

哇塞...此刻有多么地向撞墙
撞墙给我失忆好了
基础??
我连一个shit 都没有
i just have talent doh!!!
others than that?i dont have,seriously....

i just want to like others artists,
在舞台上表演给大家看  娱乐大家
这就是我的心愿

偏偏 偏偏谁也都不要帮我
只有我自己能帮自己
CHEISEY,
gambateh!!!
u can do it!!!
GO~

deeper

想把你挡掉，当掉

   不想看见

只有厌烦，没有别的

在我重新调整一切以前，停止

停止一切

难道还不够狠吗

要赶尽杀绝才甘愿吗

并不想  不要逼人太盛

不要我的周围有任何你的影子

憎恨?

到了这个地步吗

并不想

因为在这个世界上并没有人欠我

the days without you i live happier







                                                                                                      ask me anything & follow me
                                                                                                       @http://www.formspring.me/cheiseyjc

birthday celebration yoy!

yay!
good morning,world.lol
what a weird~
ready by 10.30am.
four sista include me is heading to karaoke....
oh yeah!had been long time didn't sang with my sista....

yes!room no.42

finished our karaoke session was about 3pm,headed to shopping centre....
NICHII oh nichii~\(n_n)/~
3 of them walked out with one plastic bag each,but i didn't...=(
why?no why...lol.nothing to buy....
after that,went to SASA.
they bought nail polish and i bought a eyeliner.
gluk....gluk....('_")oops....stomach screamed....wuahahahaha....
so we bought SHILIN famous XXL chicken chop!!!
awwh~yummy!!!
peeps,had ya'll tried before?if hv'nt,must have a try...!!
oops...forgot to took the pitcha of the chop....hahas.
after dinner,we back home...
jenny:oh?no need buy a cake this time for celebration?
peggy:ya loh~then where to buy?
jenny:the cake house nearby my house loh~
peggy:alright!
after that,headed to ma house to celebrate caz there's no any nice place for us to sing happy birthday to you,happy birthday to you~lol.

happy birthday to me=)

sheny,jenny&peggy

oh yea,ma present.
peggy done it by herself.is it nice?

     

birthday ya coming soon...

3rd oct 2011 11.59pm
am counting down to my BIG day.....
am curious who are the first one who message me,
and how many will message me...
but after 12.00am,and...and...is 4th oct,
my eyes closed.....wuaaahahahaha....



once i opened my eyes,
there's a envelope sign appear on my phone screen,
and a number '4' beside it...
well,not surprisingly....caz every year almost these amount of fellow will message me.
but,but this year although with the same amount but the people are not the same.
1st: 'she'
2nd: a camp's friend named AUNI(am surprise when i saw her name,unexpectedly!!)
3rd:peggy,my sista...\(^o^)/

thanks~thankyou for ya'll wishes.....

but what the sad case is:my mom is not with me....T.T

but still then,im awaiting this coming SATURDAY.....
am curious at what will them present me....woohoo....
hope it won't let me disappointed yea...LOL.